If you can believe it, I am sitting at my computer at 6:00 am on a Friday morning, trying to get a jumpstart on my writing. Am I being motivated? Is this what being organised feels like? Or is this the early stage of discipline? All that really matters is that I’m sitting here, bashing out some words. I’ll try not to overthink it. This morning has actually been inspired by a Kate Mosse interview I listened to last night. If you haven’t listened to a podcast called The Writers’ Salon yet, I highly recommend it if you are a writer, reader, or lover of the publishing world.
Kate was discussing her preferred writing environment and mentioned that she prefers to write as early as she can in the quiet of the early hours. She finds the liminal state of the morning to be the most productive time to write because she is free from distraction and noise.
To some of you, this may sound like madness, but for me, a penny dropped. Before the Covid days, I used to bounce out of bed at 4:00 am with such purpose. The workload ahead used to really excite me. It’s safe to say that I’ve lost that drive over the last six years. I feel a bit void of passion, as though my fire doesn’t burn as hot as it once did. Kate also spoke about a loss of drive and passion (albeit in a slightly different context). She explained how she gives herself a good talking-to and tells herself to get a grip! She then quoted Pablo Picasso: “Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.” Tell me that isn’t the best quote you’ve ever heard in your life! I’m sorry, everyone, but you can shove “live, laugh, love” clean up your arse! I think Pab’s may be my new hero—or at least another one for the list.
I didn’t sleep particularly well; my bed was warm, and the house is Baltic! So, I’d say this morning we are practicing discipline. I am practicing discipline. I’m a good, disciplined boy! And I deserve a good-boy treat!
One Week Later
Got ahead of myself there, didn’t I? It’s been a week since I last wrote anything for my Substack—oops! I think it’s important to note that I haven’t stopped writing, though. I decided to take a week off work and have a staycation. Life has been moving at such an astronomical pace that I felt the need to take a knee and breathe. I’m happy to report that it was the right decision, as I feel rested, centered, and present. It’s so easy to feel overwhelmed at this time of year. Everything seems to stop in January, and the momentum of life feels like it gradually increases in pace until you wake up one morning and it’s December! The logical thing is to stop and take stock, and yet we are encouraged not to. I don’t know about you, but I sometimes feel this intense pressure to continue onward, fearful of interrupting the perpetual motion I’ve worked so hard to create. I rob myself of all my hard work by comparing myself to others.
Take it from me: there are times to grind and times to rest. And the only way to know when to change gear is to check in with yourself regularly.
This week has been a creative week. I found a file while clearing through my paperwork that consisted of all my creative writing ideas, spanning nearly three decades. Countless notepads and scraps of paper. Scribblings and doodles. Maps of imagined places and world-building details like the price of butter in a made-up currency. I’ve been poring over this collection of creative work, feeling charged by the energy still within the ink and paper. It was the reminder I’ve been needing: I am a creative writer! I have some pretty cool ideas, and I have a voice that’s unique to me, and I’m getting excited at the idea of sharing it. It’s been a real joy to slow down a bit and have the chance to be creative rather than productive—which, in turn, has been quite productive.
The other great thing about pausing is that I’ve been able to process and plan my next move. Really think about what I’m doing next. The truth is, I’m not sure how likely it is that I’ll be sharing any creative content until my dissertation is out of the way. I have to hand in a 6,000-word creative piece for my dissertation, and I want to throw everything I have at it. I can’t really do that if I’m distracting myself with creative prose for Substack. However, if it happens organically, I’ll throw it up. But I don’t have anything planned for the moment. I feel like the best way to remain consistent and keep showing up for myself—and anyone who reads my Substack—is to keep the schedule simple and flexible. So for now, I’ll stick to the weekly DBrief, and anything else is a bonus. The irony being that now I’ve taken the pressure off, I’ll probably produce more.
Before I sign off for the day, I just wanted to say a big thank you to anyone who has supported my Substack so far. Putting any kind of content out into the world is a scary thing, and I have mad respect for anyone that does it. Your support means everything, and I’m always thrilled to get your comments, feedback, and private messages telling me how your week has been or how you resonated with something I’ve written. I love this little community that’s growing every week.
Until next time,
DB